I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
