Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Houston, we have a squirter
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
