Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
