I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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