eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
