Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
