he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
