Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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