who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize