i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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