I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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