So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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