She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize