I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
