Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
