He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
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Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
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I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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