Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
