All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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