At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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