My sheets look like a crime scene.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
No I am not eating basil off your cock
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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