OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Just fell off a train. Bad.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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