yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize