I'm jealous of your bromance
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
