he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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