All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
You pole danced in your parka.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
