with your own penis?
1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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