Her vagina should come with caution tape.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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