do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
