ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
