her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
