Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
