Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
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