Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
