Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I just cut my nipple shaving
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Fuck appropriateness.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I think your dad took our porno
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
