i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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