This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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