So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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