farters have to be the big spoon...
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
