okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
