if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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