I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Randomize
