Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize