Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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