Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Randomize
