My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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