shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
God I need to hump something, right now.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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