Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
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