I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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