I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Sext me about skeletons
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
