So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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